Atashi with a heart emoticon

Nicknames people call you?

         - Ella, Love, Nate, Lablab, Dam

Describe your Daily routine?

         - routine'ish

What are your hobbies?

         - singing, annoying people, watching movies, eating, READING

What else do you do in your free time?

         - staring blankly at things or spaces

Special talents?

         - being sarcastic, annoying people 

Song you usually play on your playlist?

         - Chaos Myth (calming song)

Favorite number and why?

         - 15, coz it's comforting :3

Favorite food?

         - Calamares

Favorite actor or actress and why?

         - Myung Geon Young, coz she has this amazing "stay away from me" look

Favorite drink?

         - Mogu-mogu

Favorite holiday?

         - ALL SOULS DAY

Favorite Expression?

         - "cheeps!" / frowning-questioning-almost-glaring-look

Favorite Sports?

         - Tennis (tho I don't play it) 
Favorite color?
         - Gray, white

Describe what it feels like waking up on Monday mornings

          - feeling "i don't wanna wake up"

Describe your soul mate…

          - someone who is complimentary to me, can scold me, advice me, laugh with or at me, argue with me and ofcourse, who can understand me.

Describe in one word, Friendship 

          - Loyalty

Describe in one word, LIFE 

          - Just

Describe yourself in 3 sentences?

          - Curious about everything. Easily gets bored. Likes deep talks.

Do you believe in love? Why or why not?

          - Yes. Because what else could make a person do more than they should.

Do you have boyfriend?

          - No

Best thing that ever happened to you?

          - Living

Your name in your phone?

          - Love Ella, Abot ko ang Mundo (Globe)

One thing that you Love the Most about yourself?

          - my being frank or straight to the point, less drama

What is/ are your weakness/es?

          - overthinking

Someone who knows all your secrets?

          - ME

What inspires you?

         - the thought that I am not alone in this battle

What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you?

         - 

What is your least favorite word?

         - maybe

What type of friends do you look for?

         - those who'd never leave me even if I tell them to

What’s the best advice you've given or been given?

         - from my mentor, "daghan pa ang mo abot. with your charm daghan pa ma ilad, hehehe" 

One thing you'd change about yourself?

         - overthinking

What’s your favorite quote/saying?

         " A man's reach should exceed his grasp of what's heaven for?"

When was the most peaceful day you have had?

         - early morning at the beach

Where do you want to be in 50 years?

         - hopefully not inside a coffin

Who have been your closest friends in life?

         - Vv, Nice, Daisy, Crystal, Rachel

Who is your secret crush?

         -  L.

Who would you most likely talk to?

         - thyself

Worst mistake?

         - trusting humans

Your dream? 

         - to be a person of value

Your Romantic ideas/expectation about Love!

        - 1 Corinthians 13:4

What is your deepest fear?

        - to be misunderstood

 Your Full name?

        Lovella Gelig Flores

 Your Birthday?

        :)

Darn This Feeling

While searching for a nice quote about happiness (why I'm searching it will be in some random entry) I stumbled upon this quote:

photo downloaded from Google

 Plot twist I reiterated, I needed it, a hell lot of it! I dunno, maybe I'm tired, or maybe bored. I want changes in my life, and also, I wanted changes in me. 

Yesterday, I met R, I did mention in one of my entries that I will stop writing about him bt, this needs to be written. He wanted to see me, said he will be at the office after his shift. Nt that I liked the idea, just partly. This is nt the first time we saw each other, he attended the last talk in our community, nt that we talked, just nodded and smiled.

It's funny this time tho, how we so casually blurted out details of our lives when in fact we don't need to. When in fact, these things play significant roles to us that telling it to just acquaintances would nt be right . Family, house, life. Maybe that's because we are too familiar with each other. Or maybe the feeling is still there that talking about these things came out naturally. Feeling, my feelings, it did nt changed, well yes I can logically weigh things over bt emotionally, I'm still stuck. His face did nt change, it didn't have an effect on me, even his smile, nor his body, that's what my brain wanted me to believe, so I did. While talking to him, I realized, this is me, this is what I usually am, my comfort zone. This is what it's supposed to feel. This is the love that I've been looking for. The feeling that he has given me, the sense of security. He's just the very definition of my own version of love. And I die.


P L O T  T W I S T !!


I need change.

---
sometimes, you self destruct

What Would I DO If I Weren't Afraid?

I would behead all the people who sits in front of me in cinemas

I would laugh so hard in front of people just because!

I would stare at peoples faces when they're talking

I would speak my mind and wouldn't care who's hearing.

I would paint the rainbow black because I find it comforting

I would speak English more often

I would wear the clothes that I like to wear

I would nt care what everyone declares.

I would learn how to fight with a sword

I would take up law and finish that course!

I would eat balot and eat the whole thing

I would do what I want to hell with everything.

If I were not afraid

I would speak my mind and be heard!

I would nt care what everyone says just because

I would do what I want and be happy!!

I would learn about life and smile so widely.

---

Who Moved My Cheese? a reflection. 

A Grateful Heart and A Blissful Community ❤❤❤

To my father, who did nt only mentored me in my Math struggles during Elementary days, bt also mentored me in understanding my first heartache.

To my mother, who did nt only wash my clothes, ours rather, bt also washed away our bored faces when we have nothing else to do.

To my older sister, who did nt only lent me her watch, bt also lent me her wisdom and knowledge to discern things and situations.

To my younger sister, who did nt only scolds me with what I wear, bt also scolds me with my wrong decisions and actions.

To our youngest brother, who did nt only remind me of my responsibility as his older sister, bt also reminded me of the cute little things that made my childhood awesome!

To my close friends, who did nt only laughed with me during my craziness days in highschool, college til now that I'm working, bt also laughed with my internal struggles and adult-born-dilemmas. 

To my community, who did nt only became audience to my nonsense talks and out-of-the-blue laughs, bt also became audience as I worship and glorify the Lord.

To my workmates, who did nt only see me as a Marketing Assistant, bt also see me as their sister and friend. 

To the pen and notebook, because they did nt only taught me how to write, bt also taught me how to distinguish and discover my feelings.

To all the books that I've read, for nt only becoming my companion in times when I just want to shut myself away from civilization, bt also becoming a parallel world where I cn drown in my own thoughts and still remain afloat.

To all the songs that I've listened to, for nt only saying the words which I failed to say, bt also for saving me in awkward situations where I just want to melt in place.

To all the random aliens, ghosts, mortals, for nt only making me believe in the other side, bt for also sparing me from the boredom of simple thinking.

And to the Almighty Father, for without Him, how cn I be me.


For molding me into the best that I cn be! My heartfelt gratitude! I owe you one!

Ahhh wait.. .to this dude, who annoys the living hells in me with his words and his taunts, who calls me blind and Ella Ella Ella. Who makes me question lots of things, who makes me think. Who sees the me that I don't see. May our paths go where it shall go. I'm nt afraid, bring it on!













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This is the result of the activity that we had in our community last night. It's actually fun, thanking people for the things they don't know they have imparted, shared and is capable of doing. I really enjoyed remembering how I was touched and or helped by everyone that I've met. It keeps me grounded and always, it reminds me that I am nt alone in this world.